


Free, separate, beings...

by islasands



Series: Lambski [14]
Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: M/M, Mating, silent sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-11-24
Updated: 2011-11-24
Packaged: 2017-10-26 12:11:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/282948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/islasands/pseuds/islasands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In this story I wanted to strip away our gendered reading of 'partners' to reveal the base-line of love; that we choose to mate with a person, a separate 'being', who is separate from yourself - yet at the same time you are coming together as two of a kind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Free, separate, beings...

“Come back,” Sauli said, patting the bed clothes. “Come back and sleep.” Adam didn’t answer. He went over to the window and drew back the curtain a little. Sauli lay back, taking in the entirety of his lover’s frame, his skin, his flesh, his hair, his limbs. He slowly, silently, took a deep breath. Most of the time his love for Adam came in parts, in all the particular pleasures he took in aspects of his appearance, movement and speech. He filtered and divided the sum of his being in the same way that his mind filtered features of a pleasing scene; over there a hill, over there a stand of trees, over there a road leading to mountains.

But every now and then all those parts of the man he loved merged into a single vehicle of personhood, a completeness as vibrantly tender in the autonomy of its existence as a drop of dew trembling on a leaf. Sauli closed his eyes. His love for Adam, as indeed for all the independent beings he loved and admired, was most unbearably keen when he felt no ownership, no stake in their freedom.

He put his hand on his chest. He opened his eyes. He focused on Adam’s hand that was lightly clutching the curtain. His hands were so sensitive, such a give-away as to his character. They weren't narrow or bird-like, nor were they broad or angular. The back of the hand was deceptively slender and smoothly oblique, only revealing its strong fan of metacarpals and tendons when the thumb was extended. Likewise, the knuckles, protected with their pads of creases, made his hands seem sensitive, compassionate. But when he utilised their hinges, - to illustrate his thought or emotion, - his hands suddenly came alive, so instantly uncompromising in their expression it was as though they had been pretending to sleep.

“They are like the paws of a cat,” Sauli thought. “Soft, tender, covered in close white fur. But underneath? Underneath the weapons of a hunter are concealed.”

The hand Sauli had been closely observing released the curtain. Adam returned to their bed. He slid his arm beneath Sauli. His fingertips idly stroked the side of his head.

“We can’t,” he said to Sauli, whose hand, quite of its own accord, had begun wandering down Adam's abdomen.

“Why not?” Sauli asked, raising himself up so that he could look into Adam’s eyes.

 “Your parents. They’re right next door. Right behind this wall.”

Sauli placed his forefinger on Adam’s lips. “Then we must be so very quiet,”. He widened his eyes. Adam stifled a laugh. In a swift movement Sauli was suddenly sitting astride his belly. Adam reached up and placed his palms flat on his chest. He felt the soft pebbles of Sauli’s nipples in the centre of each palm. He ran his hands up to his shoulder blades, splaying his fingers to take in their smooth ridges. He slid them back down, sliding his fingers into his armpits, then down the sides of his torso to discover his ribcage. He looked up, his mouth pursed, his expression taciturn, and met Sauli’s gaze. Still holding that gaze, he joined his thumbs and ran them down his sternum, digging into the cavity of his diaphragm, before suddenly spreading his fingers and dragging his fingernails down to Sauli’s groin, across to his open thighs, and clawing down their inner sides until reaching his knees. “Like this?” he said. “Quietly.”

“You are an animal,” Sauli said. He didn’t smile. He was gathering all his inner strength to meet his match. Their bed had suddenly become a pool of silence, a clearing in the forest of their ordinary, everyday world. One by one he took Adam’s hands and placed them on the sides of head, and when they took hold of it, grasping at his hair to gain purchase, he resisted their pull. He leaned down, gripping Adam's shoulders, at once supporting and defending himself. But he had no intention of preventing those hands from pulling him down, nor did he struggle when Adam used his hair to pull his head back before locking his teeth on his bottom lip.

He made no sound when Adam raised his hips and resolutely lowered him back down.

He knew he was in the safe, dangerous hands of love. He bit down on Adam’s throat to show that it was a mutual pact, biting hard enough to make Adam flinch.

Meanwhile the creatures in the surrounding forest moved about, dressing, talking in low voices, creeping past their room. Doors opened and closed. A toilet was flushed. Voices murmured. Sauli and Adam lay in each other’s arms looking up at the ceiling, which at that moment seemed not to exist. Their duty to face, grapple with, and ultimately comply with the dictates of mating, had been fulfilled. Love enveloped them in its silence.

**Author's Note:**

> May be continued....


End file.
